Friday, January 30, 2009


I am so overwhelmed by so much love and support from everyone. I have never felt so loved in my life. It has been such a huge comfort to know how many people have fasted and prayed in our behalf. It is truly overwhelming and I just want to thank everyone and let you know how appreciative Bill and I are. We love you!!I met with the surgeon on Friday to discuss possible options and to talk about the mammogram and the Ultra Sound. We were again given more bad news that we were not expecting. I had high hopes that this had not spread and that surgery and radiation would do the trick. Not so.He showed me the films of the tests and went step by step through each one. He is a very thorough Doctor and very to the point-which I appreciate. He said that their were tumors in the lymphnodes and that they were malignant. Those were the ones he was worried about. I thought that these lymphnodes were part of the breast and that it could just be removed-Ive learned a lot about the human anatomy. Did you know that lymphnodes cannot be removed? He said that the cancer was on the move and that was not a good sign. He showed me the tumors and in those tumors and around you could see a bunch of tiny white dots-those are the cancer cells that are spreading. He then said that a masectomy and Chemo were unavoidable. I really was not expecting that. Without more tests, its hard to know how far it has spread and what our next step should be. I was able to get in that day for an MRI, a chest X-Ray, and a genetic blood test. This blood test will determine in I carry a gene that causes this type of cancer. If it comes back positive, then I will need to do a double masectomy. So I will be a whole new lady at the end of this. New hair, nice perky boobs and at least 20 pounds lighter. Gotta have a bright side, right? So, as of this point, we are thinking about moving home to do treatment. We cant do this without our family-and we have so much support at home. Im scared out of mind about going through Chemo. Im scared about my hair falling out, im scared to get sick and im the most scared about throwing up. Im scared to lose my boobs and im scared to have implants. Im sad that my kids have to see me weak and scared. But, I also know that I can beat this. I have such a strong support system and my Husband as my rock. This is going to be hard and long, but I know that there is a light at the end of all this and I will hold on to that through all this. We had such a fun weekend with all the Lomus and it was just what I needed to keep me distracted and keep me happy and upbeat. We laughed and cried and I was the given the most powerful blessing by my sweet husband. I got to see my neices and nephew and my kids had blast. Thank you Lomus for the best weekend ever!! I have some good pictures that I will post a little later. My mom is on her way here-so I need to get some cleaning done!!I have an appointment tomorrow to discuss the MRI results and to see what the next steps are. Hopefully they include packing up my house and moving home!!Love you all!!

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