Eyes, ears, mouth and nose!

There are alot of things about cancer that I hate-obviously-but this side effect of hair loss has been quite annoying. Im really not complaining much about the head hair loss-that has actually been kinda nice. I can go from shower to out the door in about 10 minutes. I have always HATED doing my hair-so im enjoying NOT having to do it. I just wish I had the guts to go out bald without hats or scarfs. The wig I have is horribly ugly, so I never wear it and I get tired of having something on my head-especially now that its getting hot.

Anywho-back to the other annoying hair loss. When I was told I would lose my hair, my only thought was about the hair on my head. I never really gave much thought about the other hair. Like my eyelashes and eye brows and the hair in my nose(gross I know). I knew that these little hairs were there for a reason, but its not really something you think about. Because my eyebrows and eyelashes are gone, there is nothing there to stop dirt and anything else from getting in my eyes. They are constantly burning and irritated. I look like im crying all the time. Not to mention my eyelids are swollen, so they look huge and they make my no eyelash eyes stick out even more. Thank goodness for glasses!!
So since my eyes water all the time, it makes my nose run. Having no hair in there makes that snot just run on out. I get no warning-it just starts to drip. The positives of this-yes there are some- is that I NEVER have to shave my legs or under my arms or my toes =) I wont lie-its been nice!

As far as side effects go, there have been many. I knew that one of the chemo drugs I am given would cause mouth sores, I just didnt realize that they would last for 2 weeks. My mouth has that feeling you get when you drink way too hot hot chocolate. This time I actually got big sores all over my tounge. Every time I brushed my teeth and tounge, I would bleed. Food didnt taste good and I couldnt even drink water-yuck!!! And this time around, I have been nausous so much more. I still get it everyday-not too bad, but enough to be annoying. I think this next time, I will forgo the patch and try a new IV drug and hope that it works. I think it was the patch that was prolonging my nausea-so im totally done with that.

And the worse side effect of all, I have gained like 10 pounds. They told me that I probably would being on a steroid, but I just thought it wouldnt happen. I just keep telling myself that it is only temporary, but it stinks. Nothing like being fat AND bald.

So Wednesday marks my 5th chemo treatment. While I dont look foward to these, I look forward to marking one more down. I cannot believe that after this I only have ONE more. One-thats it. I can totally do this!! In Utah, my kids school got out on the 29th of May, so I just figured that it was the same here. Its not-its the 21st. The day after my last chemo treatment. I look at all the things that I am missing because of this cancer. I was sick for Averys 2nd birthday, I missed 2 field trips, I missed Easter, I was sick when my sister and her family came to visit, I missed a baby blessing and a sealing. These are just some of the things. I miss out on so much family time and I feel that when i do start to feel better, I have so much to catch up on that I am still missing things. This last round left me a lot more fatigued than before. By the end of the day, I am tired and cranky and my drive to do anything is gone. I know that its temporary and soon enough, my energy will be back and this will all be a thing of the past. I know that I still have a long way to go-a double masectomy, recovery, 6 weeks of radiation and then the start of reconstruction. Hopefully by Thanksgiving or Christmas I will be cancer FREE with a tummy tuck and a boob job. Merry Christmas to me!!

SO...on to #5. I cant wait until I can say that I only have one more. Have a great week!!